Universal Life Church: January 2011

Thursday, January 27, 2011

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Saturday, January 8, 2011

Official Universal Life Church Newsletter

Universal Life Church Newsletter

Click pictures or banner for additional details & do not forget about our weekly Sunday Service Go to: http://www.ulcnetwork.com

We The People - God Bless America

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Check Our New Catholic Items Department

More Will Be Added in The Near Future

Our Universal Life Church

Universal Degrees

We have temporarily removed our private home school K-12 through our Alpha Omega affiliation as classes are over-booked. We do however offer High School Diplomas through our Universal Degrees. We also offer associate degrees and bachelor degrees and degree programs, as well as post grad masters, doctorates and Ph.D degrees and programs.

We highly recommend Biblical Studies, Theology, Pastoral Care, Divinity, Nursing and/or the Educational Field to enhance your own personal Ministry, that'll lead to both higher wages and the availability of you helping more of those in need for such services.

ALL OF WHICH ARE FULLY ACCREDITED & ARE CURRENTLY ON SPECIAL UP TO 50% DISCOUNTED

Click The Banner or Visit Our K-12 Academy Page Via Our Website For More Details (In Addition We Offer Our Universal & Christian Academy Degrees as Well).

This Week's Ministry Job Openings

Contact Brother Michael For Complete Details on The Respective Job of Interest To You

Worship Pastor
Spring, Texas
Student Pastor
Spring, Texas
Business Manager
Spring, Texas
Children's Pastor
Spring, Texas
Student Ministries Pastor
Hampton Cove, Alabama
Children's Pastor
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Children's Director | Pastor
Leesburg, Florida
Director of Student Ministry
Lansing, Michigan
Communications Director
McKinney, Texas
CHILDREN’S MINISTRY DIRECTOR/PASTOR, FULL TIME
Carlisle, Pennsylvania
Worship Leader
Hudson, Ohio
Campus Pastor
Nashville, Tennessee
Worship Leader
Munster, Indiana
Pastor of Community Life - 1577
Seattle Suburbs, Washington
Director of Childrens Ministry - 1578
Michigan, Michigan

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Universal Life Church
Tel No: (850)926-6085

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©2011 Universal Life Church and Christian Academy, USA

Ordination & One Too Many Big Macs

Is it 18 million, 20 million or more served or ordained?

I think the leaders of our non-Christian, non-affiliated - copycat Universal Life Churches in Modesto and/or Seattle have made one too many trips to the Mickey D's drive through.

It must be something with Californian's or those who reside on the Pacific Coast - didn't OJ Simpson after murdering Nicole drive through Mickey D's as well. Johnny Cochran may have made famous the line - If the glove doesn't fit - You must acquit.

BUT - In the case of these Modesto & Seattle so called preachers I guess they think Ordination & Big Macs are one in the same, the perfect fit that goes together just like OJ thought murder and Mickey D's was the perfect fit.

What a joke! Ordination is a Sacrament, the idea of a Church is to serve its congregational members, not engage in a Mickey D's arms race of how many they ordain. I agree with Kirby Hensley, each individual has the right to pick or choose how they wish to pray - BUT to pray is different than to ordain anyone and everyone, including dogs, cats, dead grandmothers or as both the ULC in Modesto and Seattle do, followers of Satan.

Who knows - perhaps they ordained the anti-Christ or are in a race to see who does first?

Unprofessionalism, greed for $$$ from their Ministers for wedding officiant supplies, cheap generic, non legal faith based ordinations, with a Big Mac, Fries and a Shake PLEASE.

I'm surprised they don't ask, would you like to super size your ordination today? "We've got

these great full sized posters of Satan himself in 3-D" Free with an ordination or with our kid's meal.

WE OFFER REAL ORDINATIONS FOR REAL MINISTERS. http://www.ulcnetwork.com

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Universal Life Church
Tel No: (850)926-6085

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©2010 Universal Life Church and Christian Academy, USA

The Proof Jesus is Christ is in What He Knew!!!

The Proof Jesus is Christ is in What He Knew!!!

Today modern medicine and technology has advanced to where near death experiences (NDE's) are common place. A NDE is where a person dies was resuscitated and can remember what happened from the point they died to the point they were brought back. There's been many 1000's of NDE's and the majority thereof account for continuation of spiritual life, outside of the presence of the individual's body.

Secondly there is 100's if not 1000's of psychics or mediums who claim to have had contact with those in the spiritual world. Based on these individuals, coupled with NDE's we know today without any doubt life continues upon the death of our physical body.

2000 years ago medicine and technology was incapable of making NDE's a reality. Yet, one man knew spiritual life continued and that was Jesus.

If he was not the son of God, if he was not our Savior or the chosen one, how is it he knew? No rational explanation exists, other than Jesus Christ is who he said he was. It wasn't Jesus was a heretic, the fact is he scared those of the time with the knowledge he possessed. If we were living at the time, is it not conceivable for us to possibly have had doubts too?

No question about it - The Proof Jesus is Christ is in What He Knew!!!

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Ministry on Wheels

Ministry on Wheels

This is becoming very popular with Senior Citizens or those who are disabled and are unable to attend weekly Church service or who choose not too. As a Christian Ordained Minister, and with our Picture Minister ID & Badge with Background Checks this will open up the door with many for you to build a very profitable Ministry.

At a very reasonable and affordable rate of $25 per 1/2 hour or full hour - You could earn monthly as follows:

Only 1 Appointment Daily - $ 750.00

Only 2 Appointments Daily - $1500.00

Only 4 Appointments Daily - $3000.00

You can do the math - It Adds Up Fast

Of course you are free to charge more or less depending on your expenses incurred & cost of living in your area. It will take time to build up a client base, however it will be a residual month-to-month income you can count on.

Such services you can offer is Bible Study, Church Service (From our Video Library), Communion, etc. & etc. To be a successful ministry or Church today you can't sit back and await donations. Donations are down for everyone. You must be proactive and develop multiple income streams for your ministry or Church.

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Are Man's Laws as Important as God's Laws?

So many times I hear, "I/We follow God's laws instead of Man's Laws," that is all fine and dandy.

Kudos to you. But I ask of you, have you ever really read the Bible?

The Bible is quite clear about it. True Christians are to obey the laws of man as long as they do not conflict with God's higher laws. Because human governments are allowed their place by God--not because they have His favor, but He knows there must be relative order.

Romans 13:1-2 tell us to be in subjection to the superior authorities even as we are to God. further, we are to be in relative subjection to kings and governors as they have their positions due to God's allowance. (1Peter 2:13-17)

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Ecclesiastical Endorsement/Degrees For Military Chaplaincy

We're The Only Universal Life Church Who Can Offer Ecclesiastical Endorsement For Those Who Wish To Be a Military Chaplain

I regularly receive calls from prospective chaplains who ask for "credentials" so that they can become "full-fledged chaplains." They often call with a number of mistaken notions. Some have never heard of the term "endorsement." Some think that an ecclesiastical endorsement is the same as ordination or perhaps is like a letter of recommendation. Many also think that the process of endorsement is a simple, overnight process. In truth, few chaplains and even fewer pastors understand just what an ecclesiastical endorsement is and means.

What An Endorsement Is Not
An ecclesiastical endorsement is not a letter of recommendation. Anyone or any church can write a recommendation. Only recognized ecclesiastical endorsing agencies can legally endorse. An ecclesiastical endorsement is not ordination. Only a denomination, faith group, or church has the God-given authority to ordain.

What An Endorsement Is
An ecclesiastical endorsement is a legal document that states that an ordained minister is spiritually, doctrinally, educationally, and professionally qualified to represent his/her church or faith community in a specialized setting (beyond the local congregation) ministering to all in a religiously diverse context. Simply stated, an endorsement is the document that makes a "general" minister a very specialized one -- a "chaplain."

Chaplain Requirements
http://www.goarmy.com/chaplain/about/requirements.html

1.) You must obtain an ecclesiastical endorsement from your faith group. This endorsement should certify that you are:

A.) A clergy person in your denomination or faith group.

B.) Qualified spiritually, morally, intellectually and emotionally to serve as a Chaplain in the Army.

C.) Sensitive to religious pluralism and able to provide for the free exercise of religion by all military personnel, their family members and civilians who work for the Army.

2.) Educationally, you must: CLICK HERE THIS LINK - We offer such degrees and degree programs

A.) Possess a baccalaureate degree of not less than 120 semester hours.

B.) Possess a graduate degree in theological or religious studies, plus have earned at least a total of 72 semester hours in graduate work in these fields of study.

3.) Applicants for active duty or the National Guard MUST be U.S. citizens. Permanent residents can ONLY apply for the Army Reserve.

4.) Be able to receive a favorable National Agency Security Clearance.

5.) Pass a physical exam at one of our Military Entrance Processing Stations (MEPS).

6.) A minimum of two years of full-time professional experience, validated by the applicant’s endorsing agency (This requirement is not applicable to Army Reserve applicants).

7.) Must be at least 21 years of age, but younger than 45 at time of appointment. Prior service applicants with at least 3 years of prior AFS or creditable USAR service must be younger than 47 at time of appointment.

This is an actual letter from an
army recruiter to one of our ministers.

Dear XXXXXX:

I am more than willing to assist you in your endeavor to become
an Army Strong professional Chaplain and assist you in having a
recruiter contact you for an appointment.

I will be glad to evaluate your application eligibility if you would
please take a few minutes to complete the questionnaire and return it.

Providing the information below will not obligate you to anything, it
simply assists in helping me determine what opportunities may await you
in the United States Army or Army Reserve.

DATA REQUIRED BY THE PRIVACY ACT OF 1974 AUTHORITY:

Title 5, Section 3012; Title 10, USC, EO 9397 PRINCIPAL
PURPOSE: Provide data required by the Army Recruiting Command to
establish minimum qualification(s) on eligibility for enlistment
/processing into the Army or Army Reserve. This information is
confidential and will not be released to person(s) outside the
Recruiting Command.

EFFECT OF NOT RELEASING INFORMATION:

Disclosure by individual of information requested is entirely voluntary.

Failure to provide this information will result in not knowing your full

eligibility on joining the Army or Army Reserve.

Please place your answers beside each question and do not delete the
questions. You will have to click on the email to open it. Then hit
reply in the top left corner. It will let you correspond then. If it
does not then just label your answers 1- 42 and answer them that way.

[1] First Name:
[2] Middle Initial:
[3] Last Name:
[4] Male or Female:
[5] Have you ever served in any Military Branch of Service?
[6] What is your date of birth?
[7]     Do you currently possess a baccalaureate degree of not less
than 120 semester hours?
[8]     Do you currently possess a master's degree in divinity or a
graduate degree in theological studies, which includes at least 72
hours?
[9]     What denomination / Faith group are you affiliated with?
[9a.]   Are you currently endorsed by a denomination, if so who?

[10]    Are you Roman Catholic, Jewish, Orthodox, Buddhist or Muslim?
[11] What is your height and weight?
[12] Do you now or have you ever had any medical issues?
          If so, what type?
[13] Have you ever had surgery?
          If so, what type & when?
[14] Are you currently taking any meds?
          If so, please list the type:
[15] List all juvenile and adult law violations with dates (records
are checked) or the word none:
          Provide date charged and final disposition of charges.
          Are you currently on probation, do you have any outstanding
fines?
[16]    Have you ever had a bankruptcy? If so, when was it discharged?
[17] Are you a US citizen?
          If not, do you have a Green Card?
[18] Your resident address, not PO Box:
[19] City:
[20] State:
[21] Zip code:
[22] Home Phone:
[23]    Email:
[24] When is the best time to reach you?
[25] Are you interested in Active Army or Army Reserves?

The Following Questions Only Apply To Prior Military

[27] What Branch of Service were you in?
[28] Are you currently in the IRR?

Answer the following questions using your DD form 214 (Active Duty)

[29] What is in Block 4b?
[30] What is in Block 6?
[31] What is in Block 12a?
[32] What is in Block 12b?
[33] Is Block 15b marked yes or no?
[34] What is in Block 23?
[35] What is in Block 24?
[36] What is in Block 26?
[37] What is in Block 27?
[38] What is in Block 28?

Answer the following questions using your DD form NGB 22 (National
Guard)

[39]    What is in Block 5b?
[40]    What is in Block 10a?
[41]    What is in Block 23?
[42]    What is in Block 26?

Take care and have a blessed day!

Please, feel free to email me with any additional questions or concerns
you may have.

Respectfully,

Ray A. Chitwood, Contractor
Cyber Recruiter
U.S. Army Recruiting Command
MPRIgoarmy@usarec.army.mil

These are interchangeable with the Department
of Corrections for Prison Chaplains as well

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Are Ordinations From The ULC in Modesto and/or Seattle Real?

Are Ordinations From The ULC
in Modesto and/or Seattle Real?

Yes & No

The Universal Life Church in Modesto is a Church, the Universal Life Church Monastery in Seattle is not a Church, just a storehouse of ministry products over Dominos. Neither the ULC in Modesto or the ULC in Seattle have a DOCTRINE OF FAITH that is consistent within any one FAITH.

Their Doctrine of Faith is Simply To Do That Which is Right. Wherefore you are not ordained within any one faith, nor are you ordained in multiple faiths. With these two ULC's you are not a faith based Minister, you are a legal Minister to perform as a Wedding Officiant ONLY in accord with Statute. You are considered a WEDDING MINISTER.

All respective Faiths ordain, initiate, appoint and/or etc., from within their respective Faith. Churches or Religious Organizations have a Doctrine consistent with their respective Faith. Unlike the Universal Life Church in Modesto and/or the Monastery Storehouse in Seattle, we have a legitimate Doctrine consistent with that of the Christian Faith.

Our Ministers are more than just Wedding Ministers. Our ordinations are accepted within the Christian Community and they make our Ministers FAITH-BASED MINISTERS.

You are not a Christian Minister ordained by the ULC in Modesto or Seattle alone.

You are not a Jewish Rabbi ordained by the ULC in Modesto or Seattle alone.

You are not a Buddhist Monk ordained by the ULC in Modesto or Seattle alone.

Etc.

All Faiths train, ordain, initiate, appoint and etc., from within. ULC Modesto & ULC Seattle Ordinations allow you to serve as LEGAL WEDDING MINISTERS BY STATUTE ONLY, as far as Baptism or Funerals, statute does not require ordination.

If you want a real Faith Based Ordination? We offer real Christian Faith Based Ordination, or for other Faiths contact a Church or Organization with a Doctrine of Faith consistent with the belief you seek.

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Legal Expert Warns Ministers, Pastors & Clerics

As tax time begins, our church legal expert Richard Hammar warns ministers, pastors and clerics to be mindful of a legal battle that has strong financial implications on their personal and church taxes in 2011.

In the January 2011 issue of Church Law & Tax Report, Hammar highlights tax developments, drawing special attention to a California court case that threatens to extinguish a federal tax break which dates back to 1954, the parsonage exemption.

(Spearheaded by family patriach Kirby Hensley, the Hensley siblings and the mail order Universal Life Church of Modesto, CA., one of their objectives of existence was the Hensley vendetta toward Christians and traditional Churches to do away with tax benefits for all Ministers. Hensley himself stated: "I just want to raise all the hell I can, and get all the kooks and what-have-you as churches; then they (the government) will have to tax them all." Led by Hensley and atheist Madalyn Murray O'Hare's initiative, atheists still today continue to attempt to derail the tax free allowances available to traditional memebers of the clergy. The Brother Michael led Universal Life Church of Florida does not support such atheist led initiatives or the ordination of atheists and follows in the path of the original Universal Church of the 2nd century.)

Many churches give their pastors and ministers an allowance to help ease housing-related expenses, such utility bills, repair and yard work costs. The parsonage exemption allows ministers to receive this money free of any federal, and in parts of the country, state taxes.

However, a lawsuit set for trial in 2011 threatens the constitutionality of sections 107 and 265(1)(6) of the federal tax code, which establishes the housing allowance for ministers.

Atheist group Freedom from Religion Foundation filed the federal lawsuit in 2009. The group asserts the unique benefit set aside especially for “ministers of the gospel” is a violation of separation of church and state.

The FFRF cites the 1989 U.S. Supreme Court case Texas Monthly, Inc. v. Bullock to assert that tax benefits given only to religious institutions violate the Constitution’s Establishment Clause.

FFRF Co-President Annie Laurie Gaylor states in a 2009 press release that the benefit is unfair to those who are not religious ministers.

“All other taxpayers pay more because clergy receive this privileged benefit,” she proclaimed.

But the late U.S. Rep. Peter Mack, Jr. declared at the making of the amendment that the benefit levels the playing field in a “godless world.”

"Certainly, in these times when we are being threatened by a godless and antireligious world movement we should correct this discrimination against certain ministers of the gospel who are carrying on such a courageous fight against this foe. Certainly this is not too much to do for these people who are caring for our spiritual welfare,” Mack affirmed.

Just this May, a federal court judge allowed the case to continue to trial. Hearings will likely occur in the fall of 2011.

Dan Busby, president of evangelical financial accreditation group ECFA, says of the lawsuit, “This is a really big deal for ministers.”

Removing the exemption would mean less money for bills and family expenses, Busby explains. He shares that the exemption would also cost churches, to which ministers will likely turn for financial help. Churches with many ministers, he adds, will be especially impacted by change to the exemption.

“It would seem to put a bigger burden on churches,” he shares.

Hammar states the elimination of the housing allowance would have an immediate and catastrophic financial effect on hundreds of thousands of ministers who have purchased their home and secured a mortgage loan relying exclusively on the housing allowance.

No ruling has yet been made in the lawsuit, and no changes have been made to the tax code allowing the parsonage exemption. Busby believes that any ruling in the case will be appealed to the Supreme Court. He estimates this will take several years and urges churches not to be too alarmed.

Still, Hammar insists that church ministers and clergy take note of the lawsuit’s implications. He also urges them to pay attention to changes in the tax code that he says will directly affect clerics and churches in America.

ref: Christianity Today

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Have You Shyed Away From Christ or The Catholic Church?

Haved You Shyed Away From
Christ or the Catholic Church....?

Because of the sex abuse scandal?

Many people have and I understand, 4% of Catholic Priests committed unthinkable acts toward innocent children, such actions are deplorable and I can see the why behind an exodus from Catholicism to that of perhaps a Non-denominational belief.

While I understand, WHAT IF this sex abuse scandal was at the hand of satan to help distort our beliefs in Christ and the Catholic Church?

Something that massive had to be at the hand of satan.

The Catholic Church is not immune to infiltration by satan, Priests let us not forget are only human and they are vulnerable.

Led by Pope John Paul II, followed by Pope Benedict XVI the Catholic Church has admitted and confessed.

We must now leave it in the hands of God to judge.
We cannot let satan be victorious in turning us against the Church.
We need to continue to address the cause and to comfort the victims.
We need to move on

An exodus is only what was the agenda, but we need to defy satan and to remain loyal to Christ.

Stay strong in your Faith, be-it Catholic or Non-denominational

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Faith Healers - Living Dangerously

Faith Healers Living Dangerously

What is Faith Healing?

The term ‘faith healing’ refers to healing that occurs supernaturally — as the result of prayer rather than the use of medicines or the involvement of physicians or other medical care.

But while faith healings do take place today just as they did in the early Christian church, the teachings of some churches, movements and individuals on this subject amount to spiritual abuse.

Legitimate churches and movements do not equal using drugs or receiving proper medical attention with unbelief, insufficient faith, or otherwise sinning against God.

Woman who relied on faith healing

charged with neglect after son dies

A woman was charged with child neglect Tuesday in connection with the death of her 9-year-old son, for whom she had not sought medical attention because of her religious beliefs, court records state.

Susan M. Grady, 42, formerly of Broken Arrow, prayed with others over her son, Aaron Gregory Grady, when he became ill on June 2, 2009, according to an affidavit filed Tuesday in Tulsa County District Court. His condition worsened, and he died June 5, according to the affidavit.

The medical examiner listed complications of diabetes mellitus as Aaron’s cause of death, the affidavit states.

Susan Grady told Detective Mikka Mooney that she is a member of the Church of the First Born and “believes in faith-based healing through prayer,” according to the affidavit, which was written by Mooney.
Grady could face up to life in prison if convicted.

Susan Grady told detectives that she did not consider taking Aaron to the doctor. She told them that “I was trying to live by faith and I felt like God would heal him,” according to the affidavit.

Maj. Mark Irwin, a spokesman for the Broken Arrow Police Department, said investigating the case is difficult because it touches on sensitive subjects, but he said that ultimately, the authorities’ responsibility is to ensure the safety of the child.

Oklahoma statutes allow parents to rely on prayer to try to heal their children up to the point that the child’s life is in danger or may face “permanent physical damage.”

According to the law, it is a misdemeanor if parents refuse to obtain care and a felony if the child dies.
If parents refuse to seek medical help for their children, the courts can intervene on the child’s behalf.

Ref: http://www.religionnewsblog.com/25545/woman-who-relied-on-faith-healing-charged-with-neglect-after-son-dies

Couple who believed in faith

healing sentenced in son’s death

PHILADELPHIA (AP) – A fundamentalist Christian couple who relied on prayer, not medicine, to cure their dying toddler son was convicted Friday of involuntary manslaughter and child endangerment.

Herbert and Catherine Schaible of Philadelphia face more than a decade in prison for the January 2009 pneumonia death of 2-year-old Kent.

“We were careful to make sure we didn’t have their religion on trial but were holding them responsible for their conduct,” jury foreman Vince Bertolini, 49, told The Associated Press. “At the least, they were guilty of gross negligence, and (therefore) of involuntary manslaughter.”

The Schaibles, who have six other children, declined to comment as they left the courthouse to await sentencing Feb. 2.

Experts say about a dozen U.S. children die in faith-healing cases each year. An Oregon couple were sentenced this year to 16 months in prison for negligent homicide in the death of their teenage son, who had an undiagnosed urinary blockage.

Assistant District Attorney Joanne Pescatore will ask the judge at sentencing to put the couple’s other children under a doctor’s care. She was not yet sure if she would seek prison terms for the two felonies.

Ref: http://www.religionnewsblog.com/25500/couple-who-believed-in-faith-healing-sentenced-in-sons-death

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The Modesto Messiah, Satan or a Kook?

Growing up in the '60s & '70s, I recall turning on the TV or listening to the radio and having to listen to the most foul mouth, unpleasant woman, Madalyn Murray O'Hare, the right hand and ordained minister of self proclaimed king, Kirby Hensley. The same Kirby Hensley who referred to his own Ministers he ordained as Kooks. This mailorder ordination assembly line ordains not just kooks as Kirby Hensley spewed, but they also ordain followers of satan and as we all know atheists led by their own atheist diva herself, none other than the repulsive bitc* herself and that my friends is a compliment.

Roe vs Wade

Prayer taken away from our children

I listened to Kirby Hensley many times as well as to his atheist diva as a child growing up in a Christian home, they gave me goosebumps, chills of pure evil. I asked my parents, my teachers, my parish Priests and Pastor many times why??? The reply, it was their right under the First Amendment. Well today I have my right to speak out, to fight back and to answer their hatred of the 60's, 70's and 80's.

O'Hare, Hensley, and this mailorder version of a church (if that) who took the name of our first Christian Church of the 2nd century and with the word Universal, a word that is derived from the Greek Language that means Catholic and/or Christian FOR THEIR OWN HIDDEN AGENDA is appalling.

Granted their Ministers may be legal in the US to perform as Wedding Ministers, but the doctrine of this Church does not necessarily make such individuals legal, faith-based ministers in my God's eyes. I leave you with excerpts from The Modesto Bee, the local newspaper and online publication for Modesto, the home of this mail order, ordination assembly line. I also include a promotional video for this Modesto based mailorder interfaithless Church.

The Modesto Messiah, Satan Himself or Kooks?

You Decide For Yourself

Welcome to the heart of the (mailorder version NOT affiliated with us) Universal Life Church, which is most well-known for its late founder, the roguish and provocative Kirby Hensley, and his mail-order clergy certificates.

Kirby Hensley Quotes & The Reason For This Mailorder Version Who Used A Christian Name For Their Hidden Agenda

The former construction worker said he was opposed to churches being exempt from paying taxes, so he started his own church to protest the exemption. He sold his mail-order clergy ordination certificates for $5 each and preached freedom from taxes to folks who would buy them and set up similar churches.

His often outrageous remarks landed him on TV shows such as "Larry King Live," "60 Minutes" and "Donahue," as well as in articles in Time and Newsweek. He believed people created God and didn't believe Jesus was resurrected from the dead. He loved the publicity, good and bad, saying it all resulted in more money coming into his ministry.

Among his more memorable comments:

I always stand for freedom, food and sex. That's all there is. It sets people free.
Jesus was a good actor.
The Bible "is full of lies from one end to the other."
It's a thin line dividing genius and idiot. I think I'm on the genius side.
We're coming up on the 21st century and there's not one verse of Scripture in the Bible that will take you beyond the 20th century.
I believe I was a comedian and two-bit lawyer (in an earlier life) because I've had more lawsuits than anybody.
I just want to raise all the hell I can, and get all the kooks and what-have-you as churches; then they (the government) will have to tax them all.

In 1968, he ran for president; one of his platforms was "civil treatment for visitors from other worlds." The following year, he ran for governor. In 1984, he declared the birth of a new nation — his church. In 1986, he celebrated his coronation in the "Kingdom of Aqualandia" and offered a combo deal: kingdom citizenship and a ministerial charter for $35.

Trouble in paradise

Kirby Hensley battled several government entities in the 1970s and '80s.

In 1969, he was convicted of violating the state education code for issuing honorary doctor of divinity degrees for $20. The Selective Service folks were irate when the elder Hensley ordained young men so they could avoid the draft during the Vietnam War.

But his longest, toughest battles were against the Internal Revenue Service. The IRS revoked the church status of about 3,000 "ordained" ULC clergy members in the late 1970s and '80s. The IRS said they were claiming tax exemptions without performing pastoral work or operating a church as defined by the tax agency.

"They were just churches on paper," Andre Hensley said. "We were glad to be rid of them."

Then the IRS targeted Kirby Hensley, saying he was operating a business rather than a church. The tax agency said ULC failed to file tax returns in 1978-1980 and pulled the organization's tax-exempt status in 1984. In 2000, the year after Hensley died, the church settled for about $1.5 million. Andre said the church had to sell most of its 20-plus rental properties — purchased with ULC income in the good years — to pay the debt. Part of the deal was that the church would not admit fault and the IRS would not pursue the church again for 25 years, according to Andre, who would not disclose how much is in ULC's coffers.

Bee staff writer Sue Nowicki can be reached at 578-2012 or snowicki@modbee.com.

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Official Universal Life Church Directory

For Your Convenience, We Provide You With This Convenient Universal Life Church Directory

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Effective Immediately: ULC HQ Pays All Ministers Stipends (Minister Salary)

From The Universal Life Church World Headquarters

ULC MINISTERS - Earn $10.00 For Every Ordination Referral You Make

That We Accept Who Orders an Ordination Certificate/Ministry Credential

It is that simple, we want to help our Ministers by paying them stipends, or however you want to classify it for their efforts. Form 1099 will be issued at end of the year if earnings exceed $600.00 USD, however you will have enormous tax benefits, just as if you were your own self employed business owner and with a Church Charter your benefits will knock your socks off.

Best of all this will cost you the Minister absolutely nothing. Just tell your referral to include their name when asked on our ordination pre-screening. You the Minister can even fill these out yourself for your referrals.

Get started earning the stipend you deserve for your hard work as a Minister. We appreciate your efforts.

The Amount of Stipends You Can Receive is Unlimited.

WE ARE NOT RAISING OUR PRICES FOR CERTIFICATES OR MINISTRY CREDENTIALS TO DO THIS
IF You Are Not Ordained Through Us, Start The Free

Pre-Screening To Be Ordained Just Click Here

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or Degree's Website With the Trust-Guard Seal

Looking at Men Naked.....

Yes I said genitals. A lightning bolt didn't come from the sky, and it might amaze you, but many ministers do have sex.

With that said I need to apologize to homosexuals for I have a need to write this article. I just can't help myself, I need to induce to writing my thoughts on the subject and I have a need to make them public. Understand I am not attempting to be disrespectful to the LGBT Community, nor is it my place to render an opinion whether homosexuality is right or wrong. Frankly I don't give a doggone who my neighbor is sleeping with and don't forget my on again, off again relationship is with that of a bi-woman.

I just really don't understand one thing and that is speaking from a man's prospective, how can a man get sexually aroused by looking at another man's genitals?

I have no issues with looking at a woman naked, I could look at naked woman all day long and I know a certain part of my anatomy would illustrate just how much I enjoy it.

On the other side of the coin, I cannot bring myself to look at another man naked. With a woman, rest assured I look, believe me I surely try if presented with the opportunity. However, with a man I get embarrassed, in fact I try looking away. It's like please, don't turn around or please keep that towel on.

Maybe I'm too shallow of a person, I'm looking at their physical attributes and not getting to know men or women as I should? I don't know!!!

With Theresa, she is a knock out (Ms Theresa is pictured above with her daughter). I didn't fall in love with her anatomy, I fell in love with her. If she gained 100 pounds I'd still love her just the same, we could go to weight watchers together.

I just don't get it. Am I the only guy on the planet who feels this way?

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Washington DC's Best Dishes and Drinks of 2010

Jaleo's huevo frito con caviar (Samer Farha)

From the DCist

Eating is a daily activity for everyone, and over a year we consume hundreds of foods. This year, Washington has seen a number of restaurants and bars open. Some of which we visited -- Capital City Diner, Point Chaud Cafe & Crepes, Muncheez Mania, Merzi, Sidebar, Ray's the Steaks at East River, Star and Shamrock and Eat Wonky, to name a few. And we've seen the Brickskeller serve up its last beer.

The food and drink staff at DCist took some time to look back over what we've eaten and what we drank to select some of our favorites. You've already read about a number of them throughout the year -- the couscous carbonara from Rustico is a favorite of several members of the staff.

Huevo frito con caviar -- Jaleo
First, Jaleo's fantastic eggs and eggs, or, rather, "huevo frito con caviar". Decadent, yet down to earth, two of the best tastes in the world mingle and combine. A perfectly fried egg, topped with salty, delicious caviar and served with some toast. Simple, elegant and so, so good.

Brunch -- Smith & Clarkson's Deli
On the other end of the spectrum, brunch at Smith & Clarkson's Deli in Springfield. Yes, it's worth the trip. For about $10, you can get a large orange juice, three eggs, three pancakes, three slices of bacon, four hearty chunks of toast and enough potatoes to feed a small army. Seriously, look at all that food. And the best part? It all tastes great. Even the "maple syrup."

Mad Fox's Brewing Company "Festivus Ale" -- on cask at Brickskeller
A surprisingly light, yet complex winter ale. It has a heavy malt base that seemed almost cookie-like and a slight hint of earthy hops faintly in the background. The spice was minimal, but paired with lingering nutmeg and cocoa notes it creates an almost Mexican chocolate flavor. All in all an incredibly quaff-able beer.

Stillwater "Of Love and Regret" -- bottle at The Big Hunt
Maryland's own gypsy brewer Brian Strumpke creates heartache in a bottle with his herb-infused saison. This beer starts with a light, doughy malt base and you are immediately hit with a floral base of heather, chamomile, lavender and dandelion before the first sip. Upon drinking, the lavender stays apparent and blends seamlessly with flavors of grass and orange citrus. A slightly dry yeast finish leaves you wanting more.

Vietnamese Coffee Popsicle -- The Dairy Godmother
It was hot as balls this summer, so the popsicle trend around D.C. was a welcome treat. Cafe Saint-Ex had alcoholic "poptails," Pleasant Pops hit the streets and the Dairy Godmother in Del Ray came up with some wacky (but delicious) flavor concoctions like cantaloupe/mint and pineapple/peppercorn. However, it was their Vietnamese Coffee popsicles that won me over. I especially loved how the tip of each pop contained some coffee grounds.

Crispy Lemon Fried Olives -- CommonWealth Gastropub
While Commonwealth Gastropub's Scotch eggs are amazing, it's their Crispy Lemon Fried Olives, with their lightly fried, crispy, crumbly outer layer and salty, yummy inside, that stuck with me this year. They're very addictive and it's entirely too easy to eat an entire bowl yourself.

Billy Goat Float -- Sticky Rice
Sticky Rice's "Billy Goat Gruff" sashimi consists of yellowtail tuna wrapped around goat cheese, then broiled and topped with ponzu sauce, scallions and seasame seeds. However, after getting chatty with one of their creative sushi chefs, he revealed his own twist on this menu item: adding a broiled quail egg on top. He even announced he'd given it a new name: the "Billy Goat Float." It never hurts to be friendly with the staff at a restaurant -- they may end up sharing great dishes with you.

Otoro nigiri -- Kushi Izakaya and Sushi
Not even a year old yet, Kushi has made a splash on the D.C. dining scene. The restaurant made The Post's Fall Dining Guide, reviews have been almost universally positive and it's always packed. While much of what they do is delicious, it's hard to top the otoro nigiri: extra fatty tuna on top of a pillow of rice. It's fish, but it melts like butter in your mouth, and the clean but rich flavor makes it a must-order on any trip to the Japanese gastropub.

Corned beef hash -- Birch and Barley
Birch and Barley/ChurchKey has had quite the year. The restaurant/bar combo took home RAMMY awards for Hottest Bar Scene and Best New Restaurant. Birch and Barley has shown that serious food and serious beer are a match made in heaven. But for all the delicious dishes they do, one of the best has to be the corned beef hash on their brunch menu. The house-brined corned beef has a tender texture reminiscent of braised short ribs and is cooked with tender potatoes, bright peppers, sweet onions and a hint of fresh thyme. But the best of all? The dish is topped with two fried duck eggs, whose rich yolk makes this the absolute perfect plate to cure a hangover.

Bangers and mash -- The Passenger
You may go to The Passenger for the drinks. But after you've had three or four of them, stay for the food. With hot dogs by Red Apron Butchery in Alexandria, The Passenger has you covered for the perfect late night drunk bite. There are several variations from a chili half-smoke to a bacon-wrapped dog topped with slaw and barbecue sauce. But the real star is the bangers and mash. Juicy sausage on a soft bun with creamy mashed potatoes and the perfect hint of mustard and caramelized onions make this one of the best reasons to fight the crowds for a spot at The Passenger.

Salted caramel ice cream sundae -- J&G Steakhouse
Salt has long been used in savory foods to enhance their flavor, but it also provides an enhancing contrast to confections and desserts. The salt in the salted caramel ice cream at J&G Steakhouse prevents it from being overly sweet. On its own, it may not stand out from the crowd, but the dark, fudgy chocolate sauce combines with peanuts and caramel popcorn for a nutty and outrageously delicious sundae.

Morcilla with whipped potatoes and piparra peppers -- Bar Pilar
The blood in the morcilla (blood sausage) at Bar Pilar is subtle, making the pork rich and savory. The whipped potatoes plated with the sausage provides a neutral palette to counter balance its richness. Meanwhile, the piparra peppers add an excellent slightly acidic counterbalance. The peppers alone are so good that I've asked for extras.

Dim sum sampler -- The Source
D.C. has always been lacking with respect to excellent dim sum. Tough, crummy dumpling wrappers and sub-par fillings have always been the trademark of the awful dim sum in this town. Though the dim sum sampler at The Source hits the pocket a little harder, the tender dumpling wrappers and excellent ingredients make the dim sum some of the best you can get in the area, and challenge some of the best dim sum I've had in California.

Habanero Jengibre -- Bourbon
Sadly, the habanero jengibre cocktail is no longer on Bourbon's cocktail menu. But I wouldn't be surprised to see it make a comeback next summer. A light, citrusy cocktail with a habanero and ginger infusion with mezcal is spicy and smoky. Among the several cocktails I've had this year, the heat from the cocktail made this amongst the most memorable.

Whole Roasted Branzino -- Cashion's Eat Place
On Sunday evenings, Cashion's Eat Place offers a "Pass the Plate" menu for two which includes an appetizer, entree and seasonal dessert for $40 a person. There's always something impressive about having a whole fish arrive at your dinner table, and, indeed, the centerpiece of the meal is the roasted Branzino, a firm white fish also known as European sea bass. Cashion's roasts their Branzino in salt, which makes for an incredibly moist, flaky fish. Its delicate flavor shines through with just a squeeze of lemon and a dip in some luxuriously smooth Laconian olive oil. Sometimes the best dishes are the simplest ones shared in good company.

Pattison Avenue Sandwich - Taylor Gourmet
This sandwich is so good, it haunts me in my dreams. All other sandwiches are dead to me now. The Pattison Avenue is one of three roast pork sandwiches that debuted at Taylor Gourmet this year, but it is clearly the star of the trio. Juicy, rosemary and thyme marinated pork is piled on a bed of garlicky broccoli rabe, topped with crumbles of sharp aged Provolone, and folded inside a sweet, chewy Sarcone's roll. Warm pork broth soaks into the bread, softening it a while the broccoli rabe provides a slightly bitter, spicy foil to the richness of the meat. Will this sandwich change your life? Just maybe.

Universal Life Church Name & Free Ordination - The Real Story

We Are The Only Official Ecclesiastical Universal Life Church

Our Churches name has always been proprietary to Christianity and the Catholic Church. The word Universal itself comes from the Greek Language and means Catholic. Our Churches name originates with the second century Roman Church and we are the only ULC with succession.

We Offer The Only Legal ULC Faith-Based,
Certified & Verified Ordinations

All other ULC's and most online ordination services offer what they refer to as interfaith ordination. Interfaith ordination is not faith based or recognized within any respective faith. It is an ordination that is strictly limited to that of providing to recipients the availability to officiate wedding ceremonies. You do not need to be ordained to officiate baptisms or funerals.

FREE Ordination Claims (Holy Orders)

Ordination or the Sacrament of Holy Orders is and always has been FREE. However, do not let other ULC's or online ordination services fool you with FREE ORDINATION claims. The TRUTH is in most states and many countries they require of you to purchase what is called Credentials of Ministry such as a certificate, or a verification letter, Minister picture ID, name badge and/or etc. For you to be considered legally ordained these item(s) must be received by you to validate your ordination

The Only Official Certified & Verified Ordinations
or Degree's Website With the Trust-Guard Seal

Monday, January 3, 2011

Universal Life Church Network - We are the Official Universal Life Church World Headquarters. We offer legal faith-based non-denominational or independent Catholic ordinations, fully certified and verified. We are the only Universal Life Church to do so.

Universal Life Church Network - We are the Official Universal Life Church World Headquarters. We offer legal faith-based non-denominational or independent Catholic ordinations, fully certified and verified. We are the only Universal Life Church to do so.: "- Sent using Google Toolbar"

Universal Life Church - universal life church

Universal Life Church - universal life church: We're the Only Universal Life Church Who Offers LEGAL, FAITH-BASED, Certified, Verified Ordinations With a Seal of Trust. "- Sent using Google Toolbar"